How (Not) to Create a Lesson Plan

“Education is simply the soul of a society as it passes from one generation to another.”  – G.K. Chesterton

This semester I am teaching one hundred and ninety seven college students in China. That is a lot of planning. As a new teacher in the Peace Corps I think it’s important to think of the human mind as a seed ready to be plant–  Ah whatever. Here’s how to really create a lesson in style.

You will need:

Spare time

Unbending willpower

2 tsp. Canola oil

dsds

Step 1 Get on YouTube

In order to create an immersive lesson for your students you need to get onto the Internet. In our digital age the average attention span of an adult person, including that of your students, is less than a goldfishes. That comes out to be about eight seconds. But don’t worry! YouTube is ripe with content that will transform your future lesson from drab into dazzle.

asddas

Step 2 Get Your Head in the Game

You need to pump yourself up if you are ever going to be able to think of a good warm-up activity for tomorrow’s class. Since you are on YouTube already, go ahead and watch two or three of your favorite music videos to get some inspiration. It might be worth it to create a playlist that you can listen to later on.

An example of a good starter video:

dfsfs

Step 3 Open Microsoft Word

You can’t paint the Mona Lisa without a canvas.

dassfd

Step 4 Take a Break

Pacing yourself is important here. Even Arnold Schwarzenegger took a break between Terminator movies and he was eventually elected to be the governor of California.

I’ll be back… after a cigar

lkhjhjklhkjl

Step 5 Create a Template

Don’t think about the lesson quite yet. Work on perfecting the structure first. Will the students do a skit? Will there be a Part I and then a Part II? What will the temperature in the classroom be?

There are many questions to consider when thinking of a good lesson. Who is your audience? Will you need to do a review of the previous class? How much time should be allotted for–

kkj

Step 6 Clear Your Head

Whew. That was getting to be a lot. You should go get some fresh air. Go for a walk outside so that you can return refreshed and ready to weave another hem into that golden tapestry of knowledge to be draped on your students tomorrow.

Fresh air is good for your immune system. Remember, tomorrow you will be cramped in a small classroom with fifty students for two hours. You should take that twilight walk near the large ferris wheel in your Peace Corps town.

it’s not creepy if you don’t think about it

But wait… what’s that rustling in the bushes?!

kllk

Step 7 Try to Fight a Bear

Maybe you should get some sleep. You’re not going to get anything done tonight.

klmlkm

Step 8 Remember the PPP Format

When in circumstances of extreme lack of motivation, think back to Pre Service Training and the PPP format.

When it comes to Teaching English as a Foreign Language, the PPP is what you NeNeNeed. It is an instructional model designed to increase the amount of time students spend speaking compared to you, the teacher.

1) Presentation – introduction of content and language

2) Practice – students begin to work with language

3) Production – students internalise and use language

The theory is that a teacher tells students new content, practices it with them and then has them do something creative with it. The goal is 80% student talk, 20% teacher talk. Boiled down, this design is good for people who need to practice speaking a new language.

As a matter of principle, I like to add another P to this format:

Procrastination – somebody needs to put the ‘pro’ in procrastinate

Personally, I place procrastination previous to presentation. This way I am assured to wait until the last minute, write a blog post and then get down to work on a lesson plan for tomorrow.